When will Manchester United win the Premier League again? To use social login you have to agree with the storage and handling of your data by this website. Emmanuel Adebayor Q: You're trapped in a room with a Lion, Cobra snake and an Tottenham Hotspur Fan. The new Spurs Shop at the Tottenham Experience the largest retail space of any football club in Europe will be officially open from 10am tomorrow (Tuesday). The north Londoners cameclose to silverware again in 2019, when they reached the Champions League final in Madrid against Premier League rivals Liverpool, but ultimately lost 2-0. The former Tottenham chairman made a clever jibe following a task in which the contestants had to interior decorate a hotel room at . "Why do I need help?" ", A third declared: "How embarrassing for Arsenal, that the official website has stooped to the banter levels of a twitter tween. Q: What's the difference between Tottenham supporters and mosquitoes? A: A good start! "Then," says Mary, "I'd be a Tottenham Hotspur supporter." Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. 67/68. The former Tottenham chairman made a clever jibe following a task in which the contestants had to interior decorate a hotel room at the lavish Stoke Park Hotel. For more information, please see our Tottenham have started the season strongly, winning all three of their Premier League games. Competitions are what give competitive football its structure. Arsenal 2-0 Everton LIVE: Martinelli doubles lead after Gueye howler, Liverpool 0-0 Wolves LIVE: Elliott misses header from close range as Reds push for opener, Neville names potential successor to De Gea at Man United and makes huge claim about role, Sheffield United v Tottenham LIVE: Blades hit with sickness bug but eye FA Cup upset, Man United v West Ham LIVE: Carabao Cup champions host old boss Moyes in FA Cup tie, Aubameyang sends 270,000 Lamborghini Aventador to Cannes for stunning hologram wrap, 'Liverpool will be back', says Mane, who explains why Klopp is 'definitely the right man', Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window), Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window), the opening of their brand spanking new megastore, potentially facing further delays until 2019, Completely cashless system which only accepts payments via bank cards or mobile pay, 100-seat auditorium area with a 36-screen video wall to host events, Video screens to show fans 3D visuals of potential shirt printings, PS4 consoles loaded with FIFA 19 to keep children entertained. What is the difference between Euro and Conte?Euro works in Europe. FA Cup Winner. Trophy No. A. Johnny says; 'No, but I was too embarrassed to say he played for Tottenham Hotspur.' English League Cup winner. In fact, Tottenham has had a number of close calls recently, losing in the EFL Cup final three times since last hoisting the trophy in 2008. I'll give you a lift!" , Jon Hall (@castlefieldjon) October 11, 2017, Funny how a Tottenham man sugar cusses a west ham girl Brady on West Hams lack of trophies. Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? not knowing where the noise came from, he glanced in his mirrors but still didn't see anything. Theyre shit and we cant be bothered.Maradona looks at them and says Well I know Im a bit fat and old, but I reckon I can beat them by myself, you lads go down the pub. So Maradona goes out to play Spurs by himself and the rest of the West Ham team go off for a few beers.After a few pints, they wonder how the game is going, so they get the landlord to put the TV on. Vetere angered Tottenham's senior officials by revealing some of the club's transfer targets in a television interview while on a scouting mission in Colombia, according to the Daily Mail. Mourinho suffers most league defeats in his career, Kane to PSG mooted in Mbappe-Haaland 'chess game', Guardiola matches Mourinho record for CL semi appearances. A girl named Mary has not gone along with the crowd. She sits down with Johnny and asks him if this is really true about his dad. The. "Certainly Sir" replies the receptionist, "have you donated before?". A: A good start! 679215 Registered office: 1 London Bridge Street, London, SE1 9GF. The tweets in question have since been deleted. Privacy Policy. by ", The jokes continued to flow. Tottenham won an FA Cup back in 1991, topping Roy Keane and Nottingham Forest in the final 2-1, and also in extra time. Tottenham have their own customized version of the phrase to bottle. To Spurs a game or have something Spursed is equivalent to bottling something. For Team which is top 6 I think it is far to say the lack of silverware is a concern when it happens year after year. document.getElementById("ak_js_1").setAttribute("value",(new Date()).getTime()). Company number: 13367321, Spurs half time ratings vs Sheffield United Very little to be happy about, Report: Why Emerson Royal is not in the Spurs squad to face Sheffield United, Line Up: Sheffield United v Spurs Kane benched, Video: Spurs players arrive at stadium ahead of Sheffield United tie, Opinion: Analysis as Tottenham dominate Chelsea in a comfortable 2-0 win, Opinion: Spurs vs Chelsea: Three key areas where the game will be won or lost. Tottenhams stadium is indeed one of the finest in the world and reportedly cost 1 billion to build. West Ham fans have taken to Twitter to bemoan the fact that Lord Alan Sugar made a joke about them during last night's edition of The Apprentice. Heres a selection of Tweets from the bitter West Ham fans. Its God, and he says, Welcome! English Supercup Winner. A: You paint Red Devils on his dick and he won't beat it for 4 years! After Spurs revealed that they were entering into another partnership, it did not take long for a supporters to start making suggestions about where paint cans could be stored. In fact, Tottenham has had a number of close calls recently, losing in the EFL Cup final three times since last hoisting the trophy in 2008. The soccer outcomes are developing on the tv within the nook, "Sporting CP 2, Tottenham Hotspur 0," reads the announcer in his regular, reasonably sedate, voice. She asks her students to raise their hands if they were Tottenham Hotspur supporters, too. An Arsenal fan is walking past White Hart Lane and sees three season tickets nailed to the wall. A: Dress her in an Arsenal jersey! Spurs are unlikely to win the Premier League title this season, but the North London club are certainly major contenders for the top four. Why have Spurs announced that they are relaying the pitch at White Hart Lane with sheets of A4?Apparently, they can beat anyone on paper. Spurs haven't won a trophy since beating Chelsea in the 2008 League Cup final. So then, why the hell does everyone say Spurs have never won a trophy when they've clearly had. Little Johnny is last, and finally the teacher calls on him to talk about his dad. Q: Why do people like driving a car with a Spurs fan? "That's OK," replied the priest "I got him with the door." "Well, it says on your record that you're a useless wanker.", Q: How do you keep a Spurs fan from masterbating? With Tottenham Hotspur not having gotten their hands on silverware since the 2008 League Cup final, the England captain has . "What if your mom was a moron, and your dad was a moron, What would you be then?" The teacher is now angry. For other inquiries, Contact Us. When is Tottenham going to win a trophy? 62/63. Q: What do you call a dead Tottenham Fan in a closet? With Tottenham Hotspur not having gotten their hands on silverware since the 2008 League Cup final, the England captain has . Understandably, Arsenal fans were quick to comment on the club's jibe as they revelled in the joke. Q: How do you casterate a Spurs supporter? Whats the difference between a Tottenham fan and a broken clock?Even a broken clock is right twice a day! He would swerve his van as if to hit them, then swerve back just missing them. The last league title goes all the way back to 1961, when the top five was rounded out by Sheffield Wednesday, Wolverhampton Wanderers, Burnley, and Everton. What if Tottenham was a Game Thrones house?Their motto would be False hope is better than no hope.. Why did the Spurs have been forced to rename their ground White Lane?Because their Hart was surgically removed when Berbatov and Keane were sold. Of course, this wasn't the. A: A wind tunnel. , to which God replies, Its a shame because Ill most likely be dead by then.. "Oh yes, I've found your details" says the receptionist "but I see you're going to need help. Spurs drew 1-1 at the Emirates before the decisive second leg, a 5-1 victory which sent them through 6-2 on aggregate. , to which God replied, In ten years. The disappointed admirer sulks away, exclaiming, Thats a shame; Ill probably be dead by then.The Arsenal fan and his walking cane push the first fan to the side as he sulks. Why did Jos Mourinho got sacked by Spurs?He aint that special. West Hams trophy room has got more in it, says @Lord_Sugar. Spurs say theirs is the largest retail space of any football club in Europe, which set a few Gooners on Twitter up better than Mesut Ozil ever could. Famously, Tottenham also lost in the UEFA Champions League final to Liverpool in 2019, losing2-0 in the club's first foray that deep in the tournament's bracket. ", to which God replies, "It's a shame because I'll most likely be dead by then." Recommended: Arsenal Jokes At a local derby between Arsenal and Spurs last season, a spectator suddenly found himself in the thick of dozens of flying bottles. What is Tottenhams new trophy room name?The Room. (@riftyarsenal), Dom(@thfcdom), Footy (@.footyvids0), afc_venji(@afc_venji), everton fan(@everton_content), jake_1726(@jake_1726), (@ftbl.clips100), Brian (@papichulobrian2), CR7 . Antonio Conte's side could change that in 2023, with the chance for glory still on offer, in the FA Cup and Champions League. They might actually be one of the few clubs in the Prem owned by a British entity. Browse and manage your votes from your Member Profile Page, Your email address will not be published. Q: What is the difference between a bucket of shit and a Spurs fan? 90/91. I love it, this from the official website. What do you say to a Spurs fan with a good-looking bird on his arm?Nice tattoo. A: I cry when I cut up onions This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Lots of effort and history has made the space. ", This fan then posted: "Whoever did this deserves a raise. Still, modern silverware has eluded them as the club continues to forage for a major title. It reads: "Your basket is as empty as Tottenham's trophy cabinet.". FREE BETS:GET OVER 2,000 IN NEW CUSTOMER DEALS, One user tweeted: "Arsenal have lost their manners. Mocking West Ham trophy cabinet when Spurs is positively bulging! Jessica Amlee I set my XBOX password to "Tottenhams Defense". A: Because you can park in the handicap zone! Because trophies are the simplest marker of success in football. The policeman said to himself I cant let his family see him like this, so before calling them, he took the Spurs shirt off. FA Cup - 1901 (only non league club to win the trophy since the formation of the Football League), 1921, 1961 (D), 1962, 1967, 1981, 1982 1991 League Cup - 1971, 1973, 1999, 2008 Cup Winners Cup - 1963 (first British winners of a European trophy) UEFA Cup - 1972, 1984 More answers below Fred Rason The first is a Manchester United supporter, the second an Arsenal supporter, and the third a Spurs supporter. Q: What does a fine wine and Tottenham Hotspur have in common? The teacher is shocked, and she calls for an early recess for the rest of the class. They aren't being funded by some oil rich Sheikh, or some American billionaire. Tottenham's partnership with Dulux has not got off to the best of starts, with the paint company mocking the Premier League club over their empty trophy cabinet within minutes of a deal being . You can ask questions concerning the past, present, or future, whatever you want to know, but you only get one question per person for the sake of time.The Manchester United supporter pushes the other two aside and exclaims, God! Not really knowing what a Tottenham Hotspur supporter was, but wanting to be like their teacher, hands explode into the air. Oh because Spurs have won loads recently..oh dear not a great gag, Ian Abrahams (Moose) (@BroadcastMoose) October 11, 2017, What a wanker @Lord_Sugar having a laugh about West Ham trophy cabinet! Drew 1-1 at the Emirates before the decisive second leg, a 5-1 victory which sent through... When they 've clearly had task in which the contestants had to interior a! Room name? the room hands explode into the air marker of success in.! Bitter West Ham trophy cabinet. `` continues to forage for a title. Is the difference between Tottenham supporters and mosquitoes having gotten their hands on silverware since the 2008 League final... 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